Goodbye
by PhoebeGilmore
Summary: SPOILERS CHAPTER 420 AND BEYOND. ONESHOT Iruka says goodbye to a special person. KakaIru.


**!!!!!!!SPOILER WARNING!!!!!!!!!**

**Starting chapter 420**

**AN: **This is me saying goodbye to one of my favorite jounin. It's short and I didn't read over it again after writing it. I just can't. It hurts too much. I know I shouldn't cry over a fictional character. But why can Choza be saved and not Kakashi? It's unfair. Kakashi, I love you and I will miss you.

Please make me happy again and review.

**Goodbye**

Umino Iruka stood alone. He was truly alone for the first time in 10 years. He had lost the one man who had been there for him.

The rain was falling. Iruka stood in front of the stone that held so many names, too many names. His eyes looked at his parents' names automatically. Next he moved to the names his friend, his lover, his everything, would look for. He would need to pay his respect to them in his name from now on.

Lastly his eyes saw the new name. A name he hoped he would never see on that stone.

Hatake Kakashi.

He visited this place every day with Kakashi. Ever since they had seen each other here one day ten years ago.

_A young shinobi with gray hair stood motionless in front of the monument. His emotion couldn't be read. The lower half of his face was covered by a mask. His headband hung over his left eye. _

_A shinobi, a few years younger than the first, made his way to the stone. His chocolate brown eyes looked sad, grieving. His brown hair was tied up in a high ponytail. A scar ran over his nose._

_Their eyes met briefly before looking at the stone again._

Iruka couldn't stop his left hand from moving. He traced the kanji that formed his lover's name. He couldn't hold his tears back anymore. Seeing that name carved in that stone made it all so much more real. More than even seeing his dead body had done. More than all those people telling him they're sorry.

"_Yo!"_

_Iruka turned around. His friend came walking to him. His single visible eye turned into an upside down u, showing his happiness._

"_You're late. I thought you were only late when you had to meet with your team." Iruka put on his teacher face and he couldn't help but show a little laugh when Kakashi, the feared copy nin, son of Konoha's White Fang, backed away from him._

"_Sorry, a black…"_

"_cat crossed your path. Sure." Iruka knew the man to well. _

"_Oh, you already heard that one." It didn't stop Kakashi from smiling though. "I had to stop by a shop to buy something."_

"_A new novel of that porn you read?" Iruka couldn't stop his disgust from showing. He always hated how Kakashi walked around young children reading those books._

"_No." Kakashi held up a small bouquet of flowers. _

"_Oh." Iruka felt ashamed for judging the man so soon. "I'm sorry. I should bring flower too some time. I don't even remember when the last time was."_

"_These aren't for them." Kakashi pointed to the stone. "I was hoping you would take them."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because I want to go on a date with you."_

_Iruka wished he had a mask just like Kakashi's to hide his blush. "O-okay." He stuttered. _

It had taken Iruka months before Kakashi trusted him enough to show his face.

"_No!"_

"_Please, 'kashi?" Iruka looked at Kakashi with big eyes. A trick he'd learned from Naruto._

"_No."_

"_Why not?" Iruka asked._

"_Because… I'm ashamed." Kakashi looked down. "Because I look like him."_

"'_kashi?" Iruka stepped closer to the man he loved. "I don't care. I love you. All of you. Or at least I think I do. But how can I know that when you refuse to show me that part of you?"_

"_Why does it mean that much to you?"_

"_Because I don't want you to have to hide yourself in front of me."_

_Kakashi closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh. His hand reached up and pulled on his mask. He felt the cold air hit the normally hidden skin. He didn't dare to open his eyes, afraid of rejection from the man he loved most. He was surprised when those gentle fingers touched his skin lovingly. Even more when those lips kissed along his jaw._

"_You're beautiful." Iruka whispered to the man he loved completely._

It was inevitable. He knew that Kakashi would probably die one day on a mission. He knew the risk of being a ninja. But Kakashi was so strong. And now he was dead, while he, Iruka, still lived. And it was his fault. Kakashi had saved him from Pain. And now he was gone. Never to return.

Iruka traced the silver band around his ring finger, an engagement ring. They hadn't even had a chance to tell Naruto. It had happened so quickly.

"_What is that smell?" Iruka asked upon entering his apartment._

"_I cooked." Kakashi answered._

"_You cooked?" Iruka emphasized the word you. Kakashi never cooked._

"_No, Kurenai cooked it. I heated it up." A small blush colored his cheeks. At moments like this he wished he wore his mask. But Iruka wouldn't let him. Not when it was just the two of them._

"_Why?" Iruka asked, suspicious. "What did you do?"_

"_Nothing." Kakashi held his hands up in defense. "honestly!"_

"_Okay."_

"_Can't a guy make his lover dinner?"_

"_I guess he can." Iruka began eating, still suspicious. Kakashi always had an ulterior motive. But what?_

_For desert Kakashi had bought chocolate mousse, Iruka's favorite. Next to ramen._

_When Iruka had nearly finished his desert Kakashi began looking very nervous._

"_What's wrong 'kashi? You did do something, didn't you?"_

"_No. Just finish your desert."_

"_Not until you tell me what's going on."_

"_Please?" Kakashi pleaded Iruka. "I promise that you will know then."_

_Iruka raised an eyebrow in confusion but finished his desert nonetheless. While he was scraping the last of the mousse of the plate he saw something. Writing. On the plate. He soon uncovered several words._

_Will you marry me?_

_Iruka looked up to see Kakashi on one knee. Ring in his hand. A smile lit up Iruka's face._

"_Yes!"_

Iruka gripped the kunai he held harder. The memory was still so fresh. They had only been engaged for a week. And now his love was taken from him.

He felt the sharp edges of the blade cut into his right hand. He knew he should hold the kunai differently, but he didn't care. And it wouldn't matter anyway in a few minutes.

With a shaking hand he brought the kunai up to his neck. The sharp point against his skin. He looked at the name one last time before applying pressure. The sharp blade cut his skin. Blood streaming down. He wouldn't last long now. He'd be with Kakashi soon.

"Iruka-sensei!" A worried and scared voice sounded in the distance. Iruka didn't have enough energy left to see who it was. He sank to the ground.

Iruka opened his eyes to see white. Only white. Was this heaven?

A bleeping noise filled the air. He looked around and saw that this was not heaven. This wasn't even close to heaven. This was Konoha's hospital.

Despair hit him when he realized it. He was still here. He was still alone.

He was still alive.

The end.


End file.
